Nicole  00:00

I got who’s next right here. Cathlyn Melvin is our next guest on Fempreneur Coach Connection and she’s talking TEDx Talks. She’s a messaging expert who’s insight has been featured via TEDx, Thrive Global much more media Captivate, plus convert. The Courageously and other outlets with a degree in theatre performance, a minor in writing and over a decade as an educator, professional actor, copywriter and entrepreneur Cathlyn draws on her diverse experiences to help mission driven coaches and experts design and deliver life changing messages through TED X. With this episode, I hope you realize that your TEDx Talk is closer than you think. Coming right up. 

Have you ever looked in the mirror and wanted something more more in business, home life, relationship life, say word if you agree, word in 2019, I created a business for coaches to market in this wacky way virtual events, all with a seven to seven job. I’m a full time nurse by the way. And like you there were just not enough hours in the day. My partner was feeling alone. And generally, this wasn’t fun anymore. But then I realized I needed to build myself back up mind, body, soul, and even my business. So I created a show that does just that interviewing all types of coaches, life, wellness, fertility, career, financial wealth and business. Join me on my journey with some of the best coaches want to empower other coaches to live their best lives and build businesses that fulfill them. My name is Nicole Beatty, and this is the Fempreneur Coach Connection. 

Welcome to the show. Cathlyn, thank you so much for being here.

01:44

Thank you for having me.

Nicole  01:46

Oh, my goodness, I’m excited to have an expert in something that quite frankly, I am not an expert in I know much of nothing about. But I’m excited to have you here.

01:56

Thank you.

Nicole  01:58

Can you tell me what got you interested in doing a TEDx talk? Has this been something that you’re just like, Oh, my goodness, this is my dream. I’m in love with it. Where did that come from?

02:09

So, way back when I was a competitive speaker in high school, and I competed at the national level, I was an orator. And that was before TED existed, the like big TED organization, but it was before anything was online. So I had no idea that it existed. And then fast forward a few years, and things started showing up online. And I was devouring TED Talks. And I thought this is, this is what I was doing in high school. And it felt so good. The energy was very similar, the structure is very similar. And so I put on my dream list, I have three items on my dream list. One is to see the beautiful, giant waterfalls across the world to is to get on the TED stage. So I’ve given a TEDx talk, but eventually I would love to speak at the TED conference. And three is to perform with the Muppets.

Nicole  03:17

And we’re not watching I just have like, oh, okay, like, what what’s that about? Like, you just love them.

03:23

I do love them up. It’s and I think there’s very, there’s something very special. I’ve I’ve done some because my first career was as an actor. I’ve done some work, performing with Puppet tears and doing some puppeteering myself. And it’s just it’s a really magical experience to be like, with with puppets, especially in something like the Muppets, where the puppeteers are hidden. If you’re a live actor in that you’re like, tell us with a story in the Muppet Christmas, Carol, Michael Caine. He talks about an experience that he had filming that movie, where in the opening scene, he’s like, angry, Scrooge walking through the town and there are Muppets singing all around him. Yeah. And he’s walking on a little board. Because the puppeteers are down below him so that the Muppets can be looking up at him. And like, it’s just so cool.

Nicole  04:27

It is the coolest thing. I’ve never been thought about like the behind the scenes of that. I’ve never thought about how they kind of do that. So I mean, yeah, I’m sure though, as an actor, that’d be really cool to interact with, you know, these Muppets? That’s kind of cool. 

04:44

So, with TEDx once, so TEDx started after TED, TED had been around since I think the 80s. And then I think the first TEDx conference was in 2008, 2009. And so when those started coming out online. I was like, Oh, this is, this is like a stepping stone. This is a smaller, more achievable version of that. And it’s still prestigious, and it’s still a big deal to get to speak on a TED stage. But it seems more reachable, but even so it was still like a someday goal. So, last year, I was still feeling like it was a someday goal. And I ended up just like, having one of those serendipitous moments where I ran into some material that just clicked for me and made me go, oh, no, I should do this right now. And I had had an experience where I had taken a detour to law school. And I’d been in law school for just seven months before I started to drop out. And that experience that that part of my personal story is what inspired the topic that I decided to talk on. So, things just sort of converged. Last spring, and I decided to start applying, I applied to two different events and was accepted at the first one. So, in November, I gave my talk. 

Nicole  06:18

Oh, wow, again, that far-off goal, I’m still thinking like, is that even something I can even think about doing? But let’s kind of go backwards before we kind of go forwards. And so like, how do you go on a TEDx talks on this? Are they? What is a TEDx talk? I think that’s number one for me, because you’re saying there’s a TEDx talk, there’s a conference, there’s different levels, it sounds like to TEDx. What is it? And why would you want to get a TEDx talk? Other than you can say it? Other than that, what is it? And why would you want to do?

06:53

Yeah, so going back to this idea of there being two levels, there’s TEDx. And there’s TED. And TED stands, I think, for technology, education and design. And it had started as a conference, you know, a couple decades ago. And they would bring in subject matter experts who had an idea worth spreading. And so that is that message that you just feel like tugging at your heart that no one else is talking about, but that you need to get out into the world. And so eventually, they started doing TEDx. And the X means that it’s an independently organized event. So, there are over 3500 TEDx events across the world, globally every year. And…

Nicole  07:55

That’s a lot more than I thought. Okay, so you have a little bit more of a chance, other than thinking that it’s one stage, and everybody’s vying for that one stage. So it’s 3500 different stages out there, right?

08:03

Yeah. Right. Yeah. So it is it’s accessible, it’s still important, and it’s still valuable. But what it is not, is, it is not insurmountable. And I think that a lot of experts, because there isn’t a lot of information readily available, but about how to apply what that means, what the process is going from application to acceptance to performance. And so people feel like it’s this, this big, hairy, audacious goal, that they say, Ah, I will look at that next year. When really, it’s within reach. It is already within your grasp. And I hope that through my work and doing things like this, I can convince people that no, you it should be on your short term goals, that you can say, in the next three months, I’m going to hone my my big idea, I’m going to say what my messages are in the next six months, I’m going to submit six applications. In the next 12 months, I’m gonna get on the stage and set those goals for yourself. Because not only is speaking at TEDx, a growth event, it’s really, personally, I mean, I’ve spoken with many different TEDx speakers, and they all come out of it saying, ‘Wow, that was that was the biggest part of my year’, or ‘That was the scariest thing I’ve done, and now I feel amazing’. It’s this really transformational thing. But it also being able to say I spoke at a TEDx event is automatic credibility in a lot of communities.

09:54

Absolutely.

09:57

And it gives you the potential for really infinite visibility, there are TEDx talks that have, you know, 10 million, 15 million, 20 million views. And that’s not the norm.

Nicole  10:12

Not for everyone, okay.

10:15

But even 2000, 6000, 10000.

Nicole  10:21

like, 

10:25

But still, there’s a lot of people who are seeing your message, because it gets put on the TED YouTube channel, which has a ton of algorithm power, right? So, it gets served to a lot of different people.

Nicole  10:39

But mainly, you’re telling me it’s really that visibility piece, like you’re doing a timeout, talk for your own, like, you know what, I did this, I can see that being as a major boost to myself, or credibility. So it was you can always put TEDx speaker TEDx talk. Yeah. Or, but, you know, have you found that it’s gotten you other speaking opportunities, you know, obviously, bring people to your business. But does it get you other speaking opportunities today?

11:04

So what I’m focusing on mostly right now is podcasting. And so it has, it has lent me that like, bridge of credibility, people lean in, they say, Oh, you gave a TEDx talk? What was it about? Let’s talk about that, let’s bring you on. And I’ve been a guest speaker in some different membership groups and things like that. I do hope to put some energy into doing more live events speaking, but it’s not something that I’ve sought out quite yet.

Nicole  11:41

Okay, I gotcha. For a coach who is thinking, you know, what, I really want to do a TEDx talk. I want to do it to bring more clients to my business, what kind of advice do you think you would give them? And we’ll then we’ll go into your steps for getting into, you know, and I’m thinking immediately, I thought, well, you know, coaches, why would they use a TEDx talk? How does that translate into kind of getting their clients are getting new clients, it comes to them? What do you think? 

12:10

So, I think that’s something that’s really valuable about speaking in general for coaches is that coaches are teachers, they’re, they’re imparting their own perspectives, they’re importing their own energy, they’re imparting their own ideas, and helping shape someone’s journey. And that’s really what you’re doing with TEDx, too. So as you’re onstage and you’re sharing this idea that you hope will impact not only the live audience, but but ripple out as it gets online. That’s really an opportunity to have people watch you communicate in the way that you would communicate in a one-on-one coaching situation or in a group coaching situation. But it’s very, very focused. It’s very specific to whatever that strongest idea is that you believe is going to change the world.

Nicole  13:15

Gotcha. Okay. So let’s go into the steps for getting a TED talk, and we wanted to kind of break it down for you guys. So first one, determine your goals of giving a TEDx Talk. That’s your first thing. So tell us a little bit about that and how we come to those goals.

13:31

Yeah, so coaches will not be unfamiliar with the idea of knowing your why. So that determination of what your goals are is really for two reasons. The first is that knowing your why helps keep you motivated, helps keep you on track, it’s guides your direction, it’s a compass is the word I was looking for. But also, practically speaking, depending on what you want out of that talk, that might change the way that you present your topic, it might change whether you decide to use slides or not, it might change which events you decide to apply to. For instance, if you are someone who really wants to work with your people in a local geographical area, you’re going to try to get to a live event there, because that’s going to be more important than actually where it goes on the internet afterward. If you are someone who is trying to add to your speaker reel, you might look for events that have really high production quality of their video so that when that gets online, you can direct people to it and the whole sort of spectacle of the event comes across really professionally.

Nicole  15:01

Yeah, that’s… I mean, I don’t even think about that. Like, you know, obviously you get like clips but you get the whole thing, right? Can you share that TEDx Talk? Yeah. Can you two clips of it? Can you can you really show yourself in that light or the copy like it, it

15:17

belongs the transcript and the video, once they’re submitted to TEDx, they belong to the TED organization. But a lot of people will use their TEDx talk either as like a plate part of a playlist. Or if they don’t have a reel, they’ll just say, Here’s my TEDx talk. Because if it’s, if it’s that good, if you’re presenting yourself in a way that really stands out, which I think most people are capable of, especially if they have a partner who’s working through helping them, write, helping them edit, helping with their delivery, then you can just hand your, your TEDx link to someone and say, this is a great example of my work.

Nicole  16:04

Gotcha. Okay, that makes perfect sense. Okay, so So I mean, there’s many goals. I mean, it’s not just I want visibility, I mean, it’s it’s many different ways you can go and I love the examples you just gave, like, if you’re looking for local in person clients, you’re not going to go across the country to do a TEDx talk someplace. I love those examples. So let’s go into the next thing that you wanted to talk about here. And the Steps Determine your strengths and weaknesses. Now, how can that help us? Because, you know, I can I can tell you 10 weaknesses, like, you know, my enunciation isn’t that great? Anatomy, I can say all these things. So how does that play in getting us that TEDx talk by knowing my weaknesses?

16:47

So, I am a big proponent of delegation. In my own world, I try to identify what parts of my work, project, whatever I’m doing at the time, feel simple, feel smooth, like I can get into a flow, and what parts are stressful, or challenging, or unpleasant. And I want to lean my energy into the stuff that feels good. And the things that are harder, the things that I’m not as skilled at, I want help with. And so I approach TEDx the same way. Now, I did not hire an outside coach. When I had when I did my TEDx. I have a very specific background and skill set that takes me from being a competitive speaker when I was younger, being a speaker, coach, in what when I was in college, I was coaching high school students. I studied theater performance, I was a professional actor and director. Now I work as a writer and an editor. So, that sort of is this like, perfect Venn diagram that I could take and create a really fantastic TEDx talk for myself. Absolutely.

Nicole  18:11

It’s ingrained in you like to do this and be able to see it that’s ingrained.

18:18

I have I have really been trained for every single step of the TEDx process, but that’s not normal.

Nicole  18:25

Yeah, I would like for somebody like me, who can kind of get things flubbed up as you talk, you know, you know? Yeah. What do we do?

18:37

Some of the questions that I would encourage people to ask as they’re looking toward this process are? How on like a scale of one to five, five being, I am so confident, I am 100% confident that I can handle this on my own? How confident are you that you can get your idea down to that that one succinct sentence that’s going to say, what do I want the audience to understand? When they leave that auditorium? Or leave that performance space? How confident Am I that I can craft a clear and customized pitch that’s going to entice the TEDx organizers to bring me in to speak? How confident am I that I can write engaging material that’s intended to be spoken out loud? Which is something different than being able to write engaging material that’s intended to be read by other readers in their heads, right? How confident am I that I can stage and self direct my movement and gestures and intonation, facial expressions and rate of speech and all of these sorts of things? And then how confident am I that I can keep myself accountable over a period of several months as I’m writing and memorizing and rehearsing that Talk?

Nicole  19:56

Oh, that’s a good one. That’s a good one. So you’re literally telling me like we should probably if you’re not able to do accountability on your own, you should probably get an accountability coach or a TEDx talk accountability, is there a difference?

20:08

I think that specificity is always beneficial. So if you are, I would say that if you are like 100%, confident on everything except the accountability, yeah, if you’re already partnered with a coach who, who keeps you accountable, or even like an accountability buddy, that might be the best thing for you. But if you’re at all shaky on any of those other questions, bringing someone in who has that expertise, who can help you shape your talk, who can help vocally coach you all of those different things, I think is a really great idea.

Nicole  20:50

So quick question, how long it was, you said last year? That’s what you said you did it. But the planning had to have been much longer? How long from when you said, I’m doing this to getting accepted? Are you crafting your talk during that before you even accepted? Like, how does that timeline work?

21:10

So, I did not do that. But if I were to apply again, I that’s something that I would change. So what I advise people to do now is apply to the places that they’re really gung ho about that they’re excited to go speak at, and then start working on a brain dump, not necessarily drafting, like a beginning, middle and end of your talk. But getting your talking points down on paper. And the reason that I don’t want people to finalize their talk is because each TEDx event, it has a specific theme. And so you want to be able to lean into that theme. So for instance, my talk is called The Brave Leap Sideways. And when I applied to TEDx Ocala, which is where I spoke at last year, I talked about their their theme was “forward”. And so in my application, I talked about how sometimes the best way to move forward is by taking a brave leap sideways first. And so being able to take that theme, and figure out how your topic how your message relates to it is important as early as when you’re crafting those pitches and applications, because you really want to do you do want to customize each one of those applications. But then it gets even more important as you are working through that beginning, middle and end talk, because you want to show up and give the talk that’s not just valuable for you and for the audience. But for the organizer, as well, if I had come and talked about something that didn’t, didn’t include language about moving forward, or I’ve used a lot of like path imagery, it would have been different than what I had been selected to do. And I don’t think that’s fair to the organizers.

Nicole  23:19

You know, this is blowing my mind. Because I mean, I really just thought, Okay, you have it all done, you create it, and then you apply and they say yes or no, and they get up there, and you do your talk, that’s what I thought, but you’re not really telling me something completely different. You’re telling me that, you know, maybe I should, maybe you have, you know, an idea of what you want your topic to be, but you apply and you base all your application should kind of tailor your talk to that particular that based on their theme. That’s what you’re telling me?

23:49

Yeah, and it’s always the same message. So it’s not that you are changing the message. But you’re sort of changing the vehicle through which you deliver that message. And it’s very subtle. It can be very mild. But those nuances, color your entire talk. And they really overall makes a big difference in how you align with the rest of the talks in your conference, how you help that community feel, feel the theme that’s coming off of it. 

Nicole  24:29

Ah, this was really good. I remember, because I had just never been in the process. But for people out there that again, this is that long. Oh, I’m gonna do it. Eventually. This really gets the man to say okay, this is how I can really get going. And the last point we wanted to make for everyone is to start apply that that’s kind of the big point. You know, how many did you apply for how many should we apply for so what kind of say Okay, we’re good.

24:54

So I think that the answer to the should question is it depends I applied to two. But I have heard tell of speakers who applied to 80 before they were accepted. I feel, these are not people that I’ve worked with personally, I feel like a lot of that probably came down to not customizing the pitches and not having a very specific message to share. So that’s why one of the skill sets that I asked people to think about is, how confident am I that I can get my big idea down to a single succinct sentence? Because that’s really what the organizers are going to look for is: how powerful can this person be? In that, in few words, what energy are they bringing? And does that connect back to the theme that we’re trying to present? And so the people who have had to apply to dozens and dozens of events? I think that they probably could have used some help shaping their, their applications. 

Nicole  26:14

Oh, I got little goosebumps as you’re talking because I know this is like, behind the scenes stuff that you quite frankly, never get, like, you can’t just Google that. But that’s like somebody’s telling you, you need to one sentence like it needs to be powerful. And you need to tailor it. I just I didn’t realize it was that much. Or should I say that you have to be that saint and that you have to, you know, customize to I didn’t realize that so that all that is amazing information. That’s pretty awesome. But now we do now to you all, you only applied to two, but

26:49

I’ve only applied to two. Yeah, so I had one of my the way that I looked at where I was going to apply is I have anxiety and I struggle with doing new things. So I already knew that the whole process in general was going to be stressful in that way for me because there was going to be a lot of figuring out of things. And so what I didn’t want to have to do was figure out the logistics and worry about am I going to miss my flight as Are things okay at the hotel across the country. So I started with the most local and then I was planning to just like move out in a direction of like six hours like somewhere I could drive to the day before and then I ended up my so I live in Gainesville, Florida the Gainesville, Florida event had already passed for the year. So I moved outward 45 minutes to Ocala applied there moved outward, another 45 minutes to Jacksonville. And while I was waiting, that’s totally smart. Yeah. Shortly after I applied to Jacksonville, I heard back from Ocala. So then I was like, well, there’s my there’s my talk. It’s only a 45 minute drive away, which is perfect for what I needed. My next one, I want to look for events that have really high production quality and events that are places that I want to travel to. So that’ll be part of my, my next application process.

Nicole  28:30

Okay, here’s one question. You may or may not be able to answer this because like from NDA, I don’t know, whatever. But you can pay him for a TEDx talk, or is it free?

28:43

No, it is an unpaid gig. 

Nicole  28:47

I guess, if you go to the conference, is that there’s that unpaid? Can you clarify? So like so if you’re doing a TEDx talk, look around, but you said there’s kind of a no like the TED, the TED, is there? Is there pay there? Or 

29:02

I think that’s still unpaid. Oh, okay. I think that’s part of their philosophical structure, okay, is that they’re bringing people in, who are motivated by the impact that they can make. Understood. So even

Nicole  29:20

perfect, perfectly fine. I just, I was wondering if you’re a paid speaker when you do that, but you’re paid in many ways, and many ways.

29:29

What artists have what artists love to be paid in exposure. But there is your right there’s a lot of other value to to being a TEDx speaker.

Nicole  29:42

So if someone is listening today, and you’re like, look, I love the idea of a virtual event. I would love to create one to enroll people into my group coaching program or my one on one coaching. But quite frankly, I just don’t think I can do it alone. I have things to do. I have all these things that I don’t really know how to navigate the whole virtual event world. No problem. You got me your biz bestie Nicole Beatty at FinCon online, you can create an awesome virtual event, a live virtual event with me and my team. Just go to FEMP dinner online.com To learn how 

have one tell us where we can find you? Because obviously, we’re gonna have people in the comments, bringing people out saying this is, you know, this is their year, they need to do it this year, tell us where we can find you.

30:30

Yeah, so the first place that I’m going to send you is rightcatcreative.com/brave, leap sideways. And that’s r i g h t, cat creative.com/brave. Leap sideways. And on that page, you are going to be able to watch the brave leap sideways. My TEDx talk.

Nicole  30:52

Gotcha. Gotcha. Hey, we’re coming to you. Because, you know, again, this is something I never even thought like was even possible. But I do know that some people in our audience, this is on their bucket list. It doesn’t have to be a bucket list. You know, you don’t have to be 7580 to get on the stage. You can be a day years old. And get on the stage and really just knock out of the park. So this has been enlightening for me a just because I didn’t know it all. Be because you know, it gives me like, should this be on my list? Should this be something I’m interested in? What are the possibilities? So I really, really thank you, Teflon. This is really good.

31:33

You are so welcome. And it was lovely chatting with you. And I’m excited to have been able to share that and at least impact you.

Nicole  31:44

You have you have impacted me I’m telling you right now. Thank you. Yes, I’m telling him like, Oh, this is no good. Awesome. So thank you. I’d like to thank my guests for today’s show. Cathlyn Melvin. 

Speaker1:  Thank you so much. I’d like to thank you for listening and we’d love to have you as a guest if you are a coach, any kind. Go to fempreneuronline.com/guest to apply to be on the show. And at the end of every episode, we say, who’s next?